paint the town RED

kelley insisted that picking up boys is easy and told mel she was going to teach us how. so we got all dressed up and headed out for a night on the town at 545pm. mel was mortified that we had to start so early, but really kelley wanted to catch some of the ASU bowl game. mel really foiled kelley's whole scheme of picking up men by taking us to RED, a cozy bar with a fireplace, couches, nooks, and crannies - not the open, loud, boisterous establishment perhaps kelley expected. it does however have a hundred international and microbrew beers on tap. we sat in the corner and enjoyed a fantastic dinner and then moved out to the bar to capture the best seats in the center of the bar.

kelley and i tried to get mel to hit on every guy there and offered her advice, suggestions, and examples (complement him on his tidy facial hair, run your hands on those pecs, etc). hilarious. that and we are not subtle, so if anyone even paid us a little attention, they would probably realize that we were talking about them - and not quietly. needless to say a lot of fun was had and most every guy there found excuses to visit our corner and see what all the loudness was from our direction (mostly us proclaiming there was nothing to see with the a's, that mel was not gigantic, merely tall (gigantic implies that she is overweight as well and we know that is not true)and making monster impressions while standing on bar stools with our hands over our heads, and trying to explain that kelley and i are sisters, we no longer live in the same state and that mel is my best friend - it is not really that hard).

when they closed down the bar, they made everyone else leave, but us and we continued heckling the staff (they had like 6 bartenders, two bouncers, etc) and having a good time. so not only did we close the place, we really closed the place and showed everyone there a good time (meanwhile handing out mel's phone number five or six times).